Poopy Expectations

by thisisthelogblog

A good meal the night before and two cups of coffee that morning had greased my internal skids, and the heater was on full blast. I had a moment of peace, and I knew just how I would spend my time. I made my way to the toilet and knew just how this should go. The conditions were perfect and I was planning on perfect results. All seemed to be on track to empty my bowels in the best possible way. As I sat there, however, I realized that the experience was not up to par. Things just weren’t going as I had planned. It was taking too long and the end wasn’t in sight. This one just wasn’t clean. As disappointed as I was, I knew that I needed to wipe my butt and get out. Disappointment pervaded the air as thickly as the stench flowing from the toilet. Miserable, I washed my hands and left. What should have been a good experience leaving me refreshed and clean for the rest of the day left me only feeling dirty and let down. These poops happen more often than I’d care to admit. Maybe someday someone will write a post describing the physics of a good poop… [SPOILER ALERT: that post can be found here!]
-Daffy Dung